Solomon Buchi’s recent post warning men against marrying career-obsessed feminist women has drawn strong backlash from a married businesswoman who calls the comment regressive and harmful.
The internet is once again ablaze with gender discourse after Nigerian writer and life coach Solomon Buchi shared controversial advice targeted at men. In a widely shared post on X (formerly Twitter), Buchi cautioned Nigerian men to avoid “career-obsessed feminist women,” describing them as emotionally damaged and incompatible with long-term family life.
But not everyone agrees.
In a powerful rebuttal, a married Nigerian businesswoman, herself a feminist and career-driven entrepreneur has challenged Buchi’s assertions, calling them “reductive, disrespectful, and rooted in patriarchal insecurity.” Her response, also shared online, is gaining traction and has sparked a wider conversation about feminism, ambition, and partnership in modern Nigerian marriages.
In his now-viral thread, Solomon Buchi praised Nigerian entrepreneur and motivational speaker Ibukun Awosika as a model of what a “marriage-worthy woman” should look like. He wrote:
“Nigerian men, stop settling for career-obsessed feminist women who have no family values. Marry a woman who is driven, yes, but not at the expense of her femininity and responsibility as a wife. Look at Ibukun Awosika. She has been married for 35 years and didn’t let her success interfere with her home.”
Buchi added that many feminist women are “bags of trauma and extremism” and that men should “prioritize peace, submission, and family orientation” when choosing a spouse.
While his supporters applauded his call for traditional values, critics accused him of using isolated examples to generalize and vilify modern women particularly those who identify as feminists.
The anonymous married businesswoman, who has run a successful mid-size enterprise for over a decade, responded pointedly. In a voice note shared on social media she criticized Buchi for failing to recognize the diversity and complexity of today’s women.
“We exist. We’re career-driven, we’re ambitious, and we’re also amazing wives and mothers,” she said. “We wake up at 5am, make breakfast, help kids with homework, lead teams, build companies—and come back home to love and respect our husbands.”
She rejected the notion that feminism is a threat to marital harmony.
“Feminism isn’t about rejecting family. It’s about having a voice and choice. Being educated, successful, or passionate about work doesn’t make a woman a bad partner. It makes her a full human being.”
As expected, social media platforms exploded with reactions. The debate was highly polarized:
One user tweeted:
“My wife is a medical consultant and I’m proud of her. We parent together, we grow together. If your masculinity is threatened by ambition, that’s your insecurity, not her fault.”
Another post read:
“Being traditional doesn’t mean being disrespectful. But don’t use culture as a weapon to silence strong women.”
This is not the first time Buchi has made headlines for controversial takes on gender. He has long positioned himself as an advocate for “conservative Christian values,” often emphasizing submission, purity, and traditional roles.
However, many Nigerians argue that these values must evolve with societal changes. Today, more women than ever are earning degrees, starting businesses, and pursuing professional goals and expecting partnerships based on equity, not patriarchy.
Experts believe conversations like this reveal deeper societal tensions between modernity and tradition, particularly in a country like Nigeria where both forces coexist and clash daily.
